Memories

The Crystal Lamp

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But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.”  Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:30-31

My mom married my dad when she was only 19. By the time I was a baby things just weren’t working out as she had hoped so one day when dad was at work she packed her begs and with me in tow headed for her parents home. The next few years mom disappeared from my life while she worked in New York and my grandmother who I called Gammy become my mom. Gammy was pretty old fashioned about rules but I found I could always count on her encouragement and love.

Fast forward to my early teen years and though by then I was predominately living with mom, I also took any opportunity I could to visit my grandparents. During one of those visits I woke early in the morning and somehow as I got out of bed my elbow caught the edge of the crystal lamp on the night stand. Horrified I watched as it crashed to the floor and smashed into a thousand smithereens. Luckily for me (I thought) it was early enough that no one else was awake. I silently slipped into the kitchen and found the dust pan and brush and a shopping bag. Then as quickly as possible I swept up every last shard of glass and hid the bag of fragments far at the bottom of the big kitchen trash can. Then breathing a sigh of relief then went off for the day, thinking I had dodged a bullet.

On my return that afternoon my Gammy was waiting for me in the doorway. She was standing with her arms crossed looking right at me and my heart sank knowing in an instant that she had learned the awful truth of the lamp.

“Peter;” Gammy began with a slight lilt to her voice. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice that yesterday there were two lamps in  your room and this morning there is only one?” she chuckled. “You know you can always tell me the truth.” she said. While embarrassment and regret washed over me my one consolation was that I knew I was still loved. Gammy had found out the worst and yet she forgave me even before I had asked.

Even greater is the forgiveness that God offers us. In spite of our vain efforts to sweep up the consequences of our sin and hide them He already knows and yet He has already provided a way for our forgiveness. But there the comparison fails not because Gammy’s love wasn’t true but because our heavenly Father’s love is so much greater. He saw me sin and break the crystal lamp of my relationship with Him into a thousand pieces. He watched as I silently hid the hurt I had caused others by my self centered heart and sped away like a hit and run driver. While I had forgotten Him Jesus still remembered me and stood waiting in the doorway for my return. While i was sinking deep in sin the love of Jesus reached down and lifted me!

O love lifted me – Love lifted me

When nothing else could help – Love Lifted me

O love lifted me – Love lifted me

When nothing else could help – Love Lifted me

Love Lifted Me by James Rowe 1912

 

 

 

Lentil Soup and a Wise Man’s Gift

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And going into the house, they saw the child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshiped him. Then, opening their treasures, they offered him gifts, gold and frankincense and myrrh. Matthew 2:11 ESV

“What’s for dinner honey?” I said with a laugh knowing that it would be lentil soup for its fourth and final performance. Those first years of our marriage any shopping was a low cost adventure. Though Christmas was coming a tree and decorations were things we didn’t even dare imagine.

Christmas Eve came and since it was pay day, I waited line for my check (about a hundred dollars). “Merry Christmas” My boss said winking as he handed me my envelope. “And a little something extra for you tonight.”

I peeked inside and drew a quick breath in amazement. “Wow thanks Joe! Merry Christmas to you too” I said amazed at seeing the fifty dollar bill he had tucked inside!

I drove home through the heavy traffic getting there just before five. “Come on Nancy! Let’s go buy a tree!” I shouted as I ran up the stairs to show her my bonus. Five minutes later we bundled up and drove around the corner just in time where the owner was delighted to sell us a tree for five dollars, just before he closed.

p1010357.jpg Then we raced over to the Woolworth store a few blocks away, where for 10 cents each we bought some colored glass bulbs and a string of lights with tinsel. God hadn’t needed to send the wise men to Bethlehem with gifts to make it Christmas; but He did. That Christmas our wise man was named Joe and he left us a treasure that we still open every year.

The Sweetest Fruit

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They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green.  Psalm 92:14 ESV

As my Dad grew older he began to leave things behind. First, left his career and then his home town as he with my Step-mom Amy moved to Florida. As the years went by be began to lose friends and family members and then finally Amy; the love of his life. During the final years of Dad’s life he remained alone. We often suggested and even pleaded for him to come live with us, but Dad wanted to stay right where he was. While he may have begun to feel no longer useful to anyone, he actually became our family’s greatest treasure by the example of his gentle heart and steady faith.

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Dad’s life reminded me of the apple orchards I used to prune every winter many years ago. Most people don’t realize it but young apple trees don’t give any fruit at all. It takes at least eight years before they can produce even a single apple. But the oldest, most scarred and misshapen trees are filled with fruit. Each December or January it is pruning time and we trim out the dead and diseased limbs as well as the useless sucker growth. Each of these things needed to be removed so that the strength of the trees can be given to the fruit. Those older trees spend a lifetime being cut back, cleaned out and shaped by pruning.  That is why they can give all their energy to the fragrant blossoms that open in the spring, then to the tiny green apples that grow in summer and finally to the sweetness of the fruit right at harvest time. Those old trees will never win a beauty pageant, but it is by them that God has promised to give His sweetest fruit!