The Crystal Lamp


But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.”  Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:30-31

My mom married my dad when she was only 19. By the time I was a baby things just weren’t working out as she had hoped so one day when dad was at work she packed her begs and with me in tow headed for her parents home. The next few years mom disappeared from my life while she worked in New York and my grandmother who I called Gammy become my mom. Gammy was pretty old fashioned about rules but I found I could always count on her encouragement and love.

Fast forward to my early teen years and though by then I was predominately living with mom, I also took any opportunity I could to visit my grandparents. During one of those visits I woke early in the morning and somehow as I got out of bed my elbow caught the edge of the crystal lamp on the night stand. Horrified I watched as it crashed to the floor and smashed into a thousand smithereens. Luckily for me (I thought) it was early enough that no one else was awake. I silently slipped into the kitchen and found the dust pan and brush and a shopping bag. Then as quickly as possible I swept up every last shard of glass and hid the bag of fragments far at the bottom of the big kitchen trash can. Then breathing a sigh of relief then went off for the day, thinking I had dodged a bullet.

On my return that afternoon my Gammy was waiting for me in the doorway. She was standing with her arms crossed looking right at me and my heart sank knowing in an instant that she had learned the awful truth of the lamp.

“Peter;” Gammy began with a slight lilt to her voice. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice that yesterday there were two lamps in  your room and this morning there is only one?” she chuckled. “You know you can always tell me the truth.” she said. While embarrassment and regret washed over me my one consolation was that I knew I was still loved. Gammy had found out the worst and yet she forgave me even before I had asked.

Even greater is the forgiveness that God offers us. In spite of our vain efforts to sweep up the consequences of our sin and hide them He already knows and yet He has already provided a way for our forgiveness. But there the comparison fails not because Gammy’s love wasn’t true but because our heavenly Father’s love is so much greater. He saw me sin and break the crystal lamp of my relationship with Him into a thousand pieces. He watched as I silently hid the hurt I had caused others by my self centered heart and sped away like a hit and run driver. While I had forgotten Him Jesus still remembered me and stood waiting in the doorway for my return. While i was sinking deep in sin the love of Jesus reached down and lifted me!

O love lifted me – Love lifted me

When nothing else could help – Love Lifted me

O love lifted me – Love lifted me

When nothing else could help – Love Lifted me

Love Lifted Me by James Rowe 1912

 

 

 

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