The Church

Pastor AI

/ pastorpete51 / 19 Comments

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: 2 Timothy 3:1 NKJV

Having trouble with your pastor?  Tired of paying their inflated salary, and pet projects, or even worrying if they will run off with the church secretary? Worry no more: Pastor AI is here! You will also be glad to know that Pastor AI comes in multiple skin tones and speaks not only English and Spanish, but also more than one hundred other languages. For just $89,000 down and $69.99 a month, your new pastor also comes with a ten-year warrantee, and free online tech support, and if you act now, they can be in your pulpit in just 10-14 business days. We feel so sure that Pastor AI will charm your congregation with his or her riveting Bible stories and thousands of jokes, that we offer a free six-month unconditional guarantee. If at any time you are not completely satisfied, you can simply return your pastor, and we will either replace them with our latest model or reimburse your account in full.

Just imagine how great it will be. No more friction with the elders, no vacation time needed and instead of a housing allowance, Pastor AI will store neatly in any broom closet between worship services. For more traditional churches, you will want to change his jacket and tie occasionally, or for the more contemporary congregations Pastor AI comes with a variety of tattoos, earrings, and hairstyles. You will also be glad to know that your pastor will always be at the back door shaking everyone’s hand, gently patting the children on their heads and being sure to never ever offend anyone. But if you want Pastor AI to be in your church before Christmas you will need to act today, because supplies are limited. So, drop whatever you are doing and go to our website http://www.afakewebsite.com, or call us. We have operators standing by 24 hrs a day!

Disclaimer: The above is not really available, that is not a real website or phone number, and our offer will only work when taken with several large grains of salt!

Photo by Pavel Danilyuk on Pexels.com

Not My Own

/ pastorpete51 / 1 Comment

“If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear. Consider carefully what you hear,” he continued. “With the measure you use, it will be measured to you – and even more.” Mark 4:23-24 NIV

Today, God is moving in great and exciting ways, on college campuses, including Ohio State, Florida State, and most recently at Samford University in Alabama. But the devil is also at work in our society, stirring passions through social media, the speeches of politicians and television. Because we live in an age of such political and social polarization; we Christians need to be careful about what we are listening to and remember to whom we belong. In today’s passage Jesus tells His disciples to listen carefully and to focus on the spiritual meaning behind His words. Just as there was a spiritual meaning behind the teachings of Jesus, so there is also a spiritual meaning behind the words of popular figures, such as Bruce Springsteen, Tucker Carlson, Taylor Swift, and Candace Owens. I recall once when our church was going through a leadership crisis, a sectional elder of our denomination came to speak and what he said has stuck with me all these years, “What’s happening is NOT what’s going on!” So today, before flipping on the news, listening to a podcast, or scrolling through YouTube shorts, remember that our identity as a Christian is not with any nation, ethnic group, or political persuasion. Jesus explicitly told Pilate, “My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest.” (John 18:36) God has given us a citizenship in Heaven, and if we are to carry out the assignment that Jesus has for us today, we must be careful who we are listening to. That means taking serious time every morning, not just to have a little talk with Jesus, but to spend a sweet hour in prayer. As Jesus admonished his disciples we need to watch and pray because events may turn in a moment that could change a life for eternity.

Making New Connections

/ pastorpete51 / 2 Comments

Yes, there are many parts, but only one body. The eye can never say to the hand, “I don’t need you.” The head can’t say to the feet, “I don’t need you.” 1 Corinthians 12:20-21

One of the greatest challenges that many people face today is isolation. We as a society find ourselves separated by age, wealth, education and race. Sadly, this kind of segmentation is common even in the church. Our church announcements end up sounding something like this,

“The eyebrows will be meeting in room 112b on Wednesday nights, the feet are having a luncheon at noon on Saturday, and a short-term mission trip for the toes and fingers will be leaving next Sunday afternoon.”

This sort of dissection of the body of Christ seems completely natural to us because that is what we have experienced everywhere else all our lives. And though some of these specialized get-togethers are sometimes helpful, the dangers of isolation and segmentation are nowhere more pronounced than among the elderly who often find themselves in long-term care. And even in long-term care facilities the specialization that drives further isolation has been accelerating over the last ten or fifteen years. For example, those with memory issues are locked in their own ward, others no longer able to walk are placed in a separate wing, and the list goes on. Worst of all is that these people are not only isolated, but they are also usually soon forgotten by family, friends and neighbors, and even by the church. The parts of the body of Christ that God had designed to be connected to them don’t miss them because they are busy meeting with the other toes and fingers on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Today God is calling the church to do more than hold worship conferences, youth rallies and women’s conventions. God’s heart is to go out into the highways and byways, which includes the long-term care facilities in our community. For those who sense God’s calling, I am making a short book called, “New Frontiers in Nursing Home Ministry,” available for free in its Kindle format all this week.