Death

Getting Back in the Boat With Jesus

/ pastorpete51 / 5 Comments

And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. Matthew 14:32 NKJV

This seemingly insignificant verse from Matthew’s gospel held a promise for me that I had overlooked till I desperately needed it. My mother was just 62 when she died of breast cancer and her passing left me feeling like I had been run over by a truck. The years struggling to rebuild our relationship, the prayers and the conversations were suddenly over. I felt as if I were locked in a room with barely enough air to breathe. I sleep walked through months of guilt and regret for what had never been. I had often thought about God challenging me as He had challenged Peter to get out of the boat. At other times I had been comforted knowing that just as Jesus had reached out his hand to save Peter He would take my hand in the middle of a crisis. But it was just as important for me to learn that Jesus wanted to help me back into the boat and restore calm when this storm had passed. I do not know how it happened but gradually light began shining in the dark places of my heart. I woke up to find that though I might never understand the why behind the pain, just knowing that God knew had become enough. Do you struggle to see God as more than just challenging or rescuing you? It is a wonderful surprise that waits when you realize that He is also delighted to help you back in the boat and calm the wind to a hush.

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Waving Goodbye

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In him was life, and the life was the light of men.  John 1:4

As this week of the 47th March for Life in Washington I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be pro-life. Of course as a nursing home chaplain my perspective is skewed towards the end of life side of that issue and I wish more people would think about then end as well as the beginning of the journey. For example, last week friends of ours lost a close family member. Though Tom passed away peacefully with his two sons at his side the event was especially difficult because he was in a deep coma and only being kept alive by a ventilator. His sons were placed in the awful position of having to agree to allow the hospital to disconnect their dad and then watch as he slowly slipped away.

There has been a lot of disagreement on the whole subject of what to do at the end of life. I have stood by many people and their families as they struggle with what to do at that time. But rather than delving into a deep theological debate I wanted to look at things from a different angle. The worst kind of disconnection is not from a machine but it is from family and friends. Some have said, “I just can’t bring myself to see him (or her) because I want to remember them as they were.” But I have sat by the side of people I loved and seen the hurt when people they cared for deeply refused to come.

With all our technological advances and 21st century comforts; we as a society are too often disconnected from the people that should matter most in our lives. We used to sit in rooms watching TV and while it wasn’t the ideal family event at least we got to laugh together at the comedies or shout at the screen when our team won. Now we sit in restaurants while each one texts; plays games or takes a phone call. At the gym many people have their ear buds playing their music and aren’t at all interested in even saying hello. Little wonder then that when grandpa or grandma gets carted off to an assisted living facility or a nursing home; that they are easily forgotten. I see them coming in at Christmas or maybe for a birthday; but while they are so proud of their families and so wishing to see them; they sit instead day after day alone looking out the window wondering where their children, neighbors or friends have gone.

Maybe instead of having just one single day to remember the sanctity of life we should have weekly reminders that being pro-life means loving the people every day. We need to celebrate not only the opening lines of a life at birth but also the closing of its final chapter.  We don’t have to be afraid if we trust both our own lives as well as theirs into God’s hands. His love draws us together and we can know that by His grace we can wave goodbye; trusting that we will meet again in His presence.

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People are a Loan Not a Gift

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img_5240The earth is the Lord’s, and all its fullness,                                                                                        The world and those who dwell therein. Psalm 24:1

This week of my cousin Tom passed away. (He is the one peeking over my God’s mother’s shoulder) Tom was a gentle man who we thought would somehow always be there. He and I were born the same year, had been on summer vacations, horse back riding and even briefly played in the same band.together. It seemed my quiet cousin would always be there and yet he is suddenly gone.

How often we say things such as, “She is one of God’s greatest gifts to me! or What a gift God gave us with this son or daughter!” But in reality none of those we love so dearly belong to us. The time we spend here on earth together is just a short term loan.God holds the appointed time the loan will be called in, in His hands. They are not ours but how we treat those God has trusted into our care changes us for eternity.

Sometimes people are like little birds singing outside our windows. We may throw them a few crumbs but we don’t realize the value of their songs until the day they are silent. People are a loan. We do not possess someone else’s life, they belong first to God. How I miss Tommy today. I cannot go back to say or do something more for Tom but his sudden absence stirs something in my heart to treat with more earnest and sincere love those who remain behind.